BoomerGirl.com

"Spring cleaning" seems such an archaic phrase, conjuring rug beating outdoors and hands-and-knees floor scrubbing indoors. How Victorian. How June Cleaver. How ugh. ...

But every now and then, even our high-tech, 21st-century homes require more than routine (occasional?) bed making, dusting and dish washing.

Because "deep cleaning" can seem overwhelming — think carpet shampooing, window washing, grout scrubbing — let's deconstruct the project into time-manageable chunks and script them around four real-life situations (with apologies for stereotyping mothers-in-law everywhere).

1) Two months: Throwing a graduation party for 50. (Today)

2) Two weeks: Houseguests arrive to stay a few days. (Tuesday)

3) Two days: A dinner party for eight. (Wednesday)

4) Two hours: mother-in-law announces a surprise visit. (Thursday)

We sought experts to share their best ideas for each scenario (wash windows on a cloudy day, clean blinds with an old sock over your hand) and their favorite products (lots of credit goes to green, clean, white vinegar and baking soda).

So let's crank up the music and get to work. Cheryl Mendelson, author of the encyclopedic "Home Comforts: The Art and Science of Keeping House," assures us it will make us feel better because "order produces more order."

Two Months: Prepare your home for a party

You've invited 50 friends and relatives to celebrate your high school senior's June graduation. That gives you two months to spiff up your indoor and outdoor spaces.

The best way to coordinate what you want to accomplish is to create a calendar or timetable so nothing gets overlooked, says Cheryl Mendelson, author of "Home Comforts."

Get the heaviest, deep-cleaning chores out of the way first. If you're going to call in professionals, whether for steam cleaning the carpet or pruning the shrubs, book early because June is prime celebration season.

Indoors, the most labor-intensive tasks mean windows, upholstery, rugs and curtains. Outdoors, they include cleaning the patio furniture and grill, and getting the yard and gardens in shape. Once the house sparkles, routine maintenance will be fine for the week leading up to the grand event.

In the family and living rooms, consider cleaning the rugs and upholstery. If they are really showing dirt, rent a steamer or book professionals to do it. Vacuum along the ceilings and baseboards to remove spider webs. Wash or dust blinds; vacuum or wash curtains, or send them out for professional care.

Window washing is a dreaded chore, but it makes more difference than almost anything else, contends Donna Smallin, author of "The One-Minute Cleaner." This may be where you want to call in the pros, especially if you have high, hard-to-reach windows. Most charge by the window, so if you can afford only a semi-splurge, include just the windows in the "public spaces."

If you do your own, start inside using horizontal motions, then move outside and use vertical motions. That way, you can see the spots you've missed. And though it may sound counterintuitive, cool, cloudy days are best for window washing. Hot sun dries window cleaner faster than it can be wiped off, which causes streaking, Smallin says. Some experts recommend crumpled newspaper (avoid pages with colored ink) to wipe off window cleaner because it does not leave lint and is less wasteful than using paper towels. Others prefer squeegees.

If sprucing up the front entry or garden, buy plants by early May for the best selection and to allow them to fill in. This is also a good time to power-wash the deck, scour the grill and clean, repaint or replace lawn furniture. Check outdoor steps and structures for loose stones or boards.

A few days before the soiree, mow the lawn and pull weeds. The day before, dust and vacuum the house.

And don't forget to locate the scrapbooks and old family pictures well in advance, Mendelson says. "Graduation is a great time for memory stuff. I'd get photo albums in order to lay them out on coffee tables."