BoomerGirl Diary

It is January 1st.

I am in Germany, here for six weeks.

While working, I’m aware that I’ll also have a great gift: time. Not a lot, not like a sabbatical or vacation, but enough.

I’ll be living in a small suite. While I have a fridge and microwave, I have no real kitchen, thus no expectations that I should cook. The only laundry to do is my own.

I have no domestic chores, no cleaning, no yard, no kids here, not even a husband (sweet as he is) to worry about.

Far fewer calls or e-mails than at home.

I have no responsibilities other than to do my job well. A job which will, more often than not, be over at 5 p.m.. Maybe. Depending.

Which leaves, remarkably, this block of time called an evening.

I can eat when I want, explore, sleep, read, write (like this.)

In other words, no excuses.

I want to be productive (writing, reading, thinking, exercising) and yet indulgent (ample time at the baths/sauna/spa, eating food that I choose and enjoy, no-destination drives in the country, etc.) I want to soften the tense worry-lines that have defined my face for the last few decades. I want to lose some guilt, and that omnipresent feeling that I should hurry up, that I need to be doing something else, that I haven’t crossed off enough on my "list." I want a few weeks of life not defined by lists.

It is unfamiliar territory.

It’s also interesting that I just wrote a list of things I want to do that includes not living by lists.

This could be more of a challenge than anticipated.

On New Year’s Eve, alone, I walked the streets of the town, cobblestone and brick pedestrian walkways (because the center of a town or city should be for people and not traffic.) I went to a free concert, a quintet, in a church. It ended about 11 p.m. and I strolled back to the hotel. At midnight, the fireworks started. Germany celebrates New Year’s Eve as the U.S. celebrates the 4th of July, with much noise and fireworks. Some cities put on tremendous displays, but individuals feel entitled to develop their own. No laws that I could see on “No fireworks within the town” as there were fireworks going off all over the place, reflecting in the river, outlining the church spires and steep roofs of the houses, red-blue-gold-silver-white and every other color exploding. It went on for over 30 minutes. By the end the trees and cars and streets were covered in ash.

I wanted to start the New Year symbolically ( as opposed to my usual symbolic start of cleaning out a closet). I’d heard of the thermal baths and saunas at Bad Kissingen. Giving my body a true day of rest seemed the right symbol. At almost 58, the tired body is ready for a little nurturing.

Bad Kissingen is in northern Bavaria. “Bad” means baths, so that aspect of town life has always been present. But KissSalis Therme is the more contemporary rendition. It is a massive, modernistic structure on a hill, looking Disney-esque at a distance. Inside there are big pools of warm water with outdoor sections where steam rises in the cold winter air. There are aromatherapy rooms for relaxation, a sun-room (like a giant tanning bed, with sand.) Three generations of families play together and nap on the lounges surrounding the pools.

Then there is the SaunaPark section. Suits not allowed, although everyone carries a towel or robe. The more modest wear their terry robes, or have their towels draped around their bodies. Other stroll about with their towel over their shoulder. There is no correlation between youth, body size and modesty. The Germans are obviously more accepting of normal bodies than thin-obsessed Americans. Or it could be that if they get to do this whenever they want, and it is not a practice reserved for the affluent, they have grown more self-accepting just from being able to “feel” their bodies rather than evaluate solely on appearance. As in “I like my body because it makes me feel good.”

After four hours at Bad Kissingen, I am so loving my body. OK, I would like to be less "ample," but the feeling parts work just fine.

Unlike the baths at Baden-Baden (see prior column from last summer), which are a traditional German bath experience, there is no fixed protocol at Bad Kissingen. You pay by the hour. After four hours, you can stay all day for one fee.

After four hours I am a noodle. Every muscle is loose. My skin, usually dry and itchy in winter, is soft and smooth as a baby’s cheek. For four hours I did it all: lounge in thermal baths, sauna, plunge (in a cool pool or under a cold shower-burst for just a second), steam, plunge, sauna, sauna, plunge, nap on lounge chair, sauna, plunge, sauna, sauna, plunge, steam …. I could have interrupted the flow and sauntered over to the restaurant (yes, suits and towels OK) for a cold beer and sandwich or salad (full menu available) but I couldn’t stand to leave the SaunaPark. There are indoor saunas, but also three wood-hut style saunas outside with a little path connecting them. Each has a different "feel"; all are hot. Very hot. Hurts to breathe at first hot. But then the body adapts, the lungs open, the skin sweats, muscles soften. My busy-busy mind, usually as frantic as a hamster-on-a-wheel, quietly goes blank. I have no worries, no agenda, no lists. I am, for once, in the moment.

It is a splendid way to start the new year.

I resolve to come here at least once a week for as long as I am here.

This may be a resolution I can keep.