The fact is that women who can financially afford to avoid marriage do. This is not only true in the western world but is also increasingly the trend in Asia and Africa. The trade offs involved in marriage are not worth it. I know plenty of women who would rather work a few extra hours in order to buy that 5 bedroom house (I don't know why a single woman would want a 5 bedroom house ) than marry which is viewed as more taxing. They evaluate their options in just such a cold and utilitarian way too. More and more middleaged women who are financially self sufficient are opting to go out with younger men who are generally more willing to accept the equality of women that are older men. When I was 30 I married a man who was 23 and was quite enlightened in most ways but was very jealous and possessive. I found my life was too limited within the confines of marriage and divorced him after 7 yrs. I am now 45 and would not consider marrying again but would consider cohabitation. I am dating a few men- all more than 10 yrs younger which is not unusual these days.I do love men and do find that younger men have a lot to offer but youth alone does not guarantee that they will not be possessive as my situation with my ex husband proves. Realistically, marriage is a dying institution, and this is welcome news for some women; marriage has been romanticized, idealized drudgery for most women. Too many men still believe that if they put a ring on your finger they own you. The next generation of men are far better in this regard than the current generation, but they still have a long way to go. Women should celebrate- and many are- the new freedoms that are available to them. The death of marriage is ushering in the replacement of marriage by something better- relationships based on mutual affection, love and understanding- all the things marriage was alleged to be about but was not.
gigiz (anonymous) says...
The fact is that women who can financially afford to avoid marriage do. This is not only true in the western world but is also increasingly the trend in Asia and Africa. The trade offs involved in marriage are not worth it. I know plenty of women who would rather work a few extra hours in order to buy that 5 bedroom house (I don't know why a single woman would want a 5 bedroom house ) than marry which is viewed as more taxing. They evaluate their options in just such a cold and utilitarian way too. More and more middleaged women who are financially self sufficient are opting to go out with younger men who are generally more willing to accept the equality of women that are older men. When I was 30 I married a man who was 23 and was quite enlightened in most ways but was very jealous and possessive. I found my life was too limited within the confines of marriage and divorced him after 7 yrs. I am now 45 and would not consider marrying again but would consider cohabitation. I am dating a few men- all more than 10 yrs younger which is not unusual these days.I do love men and do find that younger men have a lot to offer but youth alone does not guarantee that they will not be possessive as my situation with my ex husband proves. Realistically, marriage is a dying institution, and this is welcome news for some women; marriage has been romanticized, idealized drudgery for most women. Too many men still believe that if they put a ring on your finger they own you. The next generation of men are far better in this regard than the current generation, but they still have a long way to go. Women should celebrate- and many are- the new freedoms that are available to them. The death of marriage is ushering in the replacement of marriage by something better- relationships based on mutual affection, love and understanding- all the things marriage was alleged to be about but was not.
On Women after 50 don't want to be a 'nurse or a purse'
November 29, 2007 at 8:27 a.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )