September 6, 2007
I've been thinking about my mother a lot in the past few weeks. Her sister came to visit us, and the resemblance to her eldest sister was startling. It's also been five years since she passed away, so my thoughts have turned to the that gifts that she left us.
Her legacy was broad, and unfortunately that broadness has evidenced itself most in my thighs. I also might have been just as happy to not acquire the unibrow and the ability to grow a better mustache than a lumberjack. I could have also passed on the propensity to German stoutness and excessive stoicism.
But there is a gift from Mother that I do hold very dear, one that I've used for years.
It is The Look.
I quote from her obituary:
She kept us in line with a stern look that would melt the insides of lesser-trained children, inspiring us to ask to be spanked as a preference.
That is not an exaggeration.
God forbid you disappointed her. God forbid you sassed. If you were stu-pid enough to cross her well-defined lines, I swear that you could hear The Look power up, like someone had hit the switch of a massive and mighty underground machine: a low, throaty rumble with a high whine overlay, and somewhere inside of her, synapses would fire in a certain sequence and she would turn, turn to-wards you, slowly, chin down, head rigid on her neck, thick eyebrows on "Stun", and hard hazel eyes would latch onto you and ...
Aaaacchahrrrggg! Post-traumatic stress syndrome!
In my youth I was regularly voted Most Likely to Provoke, and was the child who fell prostrate most often under the weight of The Look, so it should come as no surprise that I am the only one of her three daughters to inherit it. But I do not use this gift with abandon. I know the power of it, and I take care to use it for good, and only when I must.
After all, I studied with the Obi-Wan Kenobi of Looks.
Before I mastered the power of it, I will admit that I used it for fun now and again, mostly on my little sisters and usually just to give them a good scare. Later in life, I used it on my step-daughter, my niece, the sales reps who reported to me, rude drivers, and people in an audience who dared to talk when I was speak-ing.
I actually turned the weapon on the maker of it one time, and Mother whispered to my husband: "I hope to never see that again."
Comments
bornin1955 (anonymous) says...
My mother was the master of "the look". She could reduce you to tears without saying a word.
September 6, 2007 at 7:11 p.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
debster52 (anonymous) says...
lol...my children say it is not so much "the look" as it is "the look" combined with these 2 little words...excuse me?? lol...thanks for the laugh....
September 11, 2007 at 8:33 a.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
Margo (anonymous) says...
I have mastered "The Look". And I use it to my greatest advantage. Thanks, Mom!
September 11, 2007 at 6:34 p.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
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